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Gina Raimondo
All-Star Fantasy Secretary of Commerce
Gina Raimondo is highly qualified for the position of Secretary of Commerce due to her extensive background in economic development, business growth, and technological innovation. As the former governor of Rhode Island, she implemented policies that fostered job creation, workforce development, and small business support. Her leadership in the public and private sectors has given her a comprehensive understanding of how to drive economic competitiveness while ensuring inclusivity in growth.
As Secretary of Commerce, Raimondo has been at the forefront of advancing American manufacturing, strengthening supply chains, and investing in research and development. She has played a key role in the CHIPS and Science Act, which aims to revitalize domestic semiconductor production and reduce reliance on foreign technology. Her commitment to economic resilience, digital infrastructure, and global trade policy makes her a dynamic leader in strengthening the nation’s economic standing.
Howard Lutnick, Current Secretary of Commerce
Ah yes, our Secretary of Commerce, Mr. Lutnick — because when you think “Champion of the Working Class,” you naturally picture a Wall Street multimillionaire in a custom suit, casually suggesting that tariffs and recessions are “worth it.” Worth it for whom, Howard? Not the millions of Americans who can’t afford a full tank of gas or have to stress over a $300 emergency. But sure, let’s trust guys like Mr. Lutnick — who helped build the economic rollercoaster — to be the ones operating the safety bar. Surely he’ll stop pulling the tariff-and-recession lever just before it starts hurting him or his millionaire friends.